To actually do your creative thing right in front of an audience and have them judge it right there—that's exciting. - Jerry Seinfeld
The fear of public speaking ranks ahead of the fear of death.1 I would not go so far personally, but like most people, I have great anxiety about the idea. The fear is limiting, and so I am determined to beat it into submission.
Toastmasters has been on my list of things to do for more than a decade. Finding myself without some of my traditional activities after I moved to Victoria, it finally bubbled to the top. I tried a few groups around Victoria and settled on one in James Bay.
Toastmasters often receive requests for help from the local community. This is how I come to judge the 4H regional speaking championships for nine to twelve year olds. It is inspiring to witness a counterpoint to the endless parade of disheartening news of youth in the media. I secretly hope to do as well as any of these kids in my first competition, which is two short weeks away.
The Golden Gavel is for people with less than 18 months of speaking experience. It’s amateur status lulls me into a sense of security. I prepare a speech about a car accident and deliver it on the first night of the preliminaries. My stomach clenches, and I speak too fast, as always, but do reasonably well. When I hear the other speakers, I know I am not moving on to the finals, but as losers say everywhere, “Winning isn’t everything”.
I find the adrenaline and fear addicting, and the better I get, the more I like it. I’ll try again, and maybe one day, I’ll feel capable of taking on that nine year old girl that gave a speech about butterflies.
Footnotes
- Bruskin Associates, 1973; Motley, 1988; Richmond & McCroskey, 1995 [↩]
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[...] it as a speech for a Toastmasters event I competed in May 24th. I was not happy with how I did in my first competition, so I wanted to try again. I managed my nerves much better, which is good, and I won, which is [...]