My Mind's Ink

The extraction goes much better this time. They retrieve 14 eggs from Michelle. We are thrilled. Not all of the eggs will be mature, and not all of them will fertilize, but no one can tell us any of that now.

I ask if I can be present during fertilization, but I am firmly denied. This is what I expect and it is definitely for the best. The last thing you want in a lab, where delicate life-changing tasks are underway, is me standing in the corner pointing at equipment, “Cool. What does that do?”

Day One – Good News

The news from the embryologist the following morning is terrific. Thirteen of the fourteen eggs were mature, which is above average. They used a frozen sample of my sperm, which apparently knocks some of the pep out of them, so getting ten of them to fertilize is also great news.

Day Two – My Zygote is an Honor Student at the IVF Clinic

One of the embryologists phones each morning to give us an update on how our embryos are progressing. This morning she starts by explaining the system for assessing embryos. “We grade each embryo on a scale of 20. A score of 15 to 17 is the average. Exceptional embryos score 18 and 19. Perfect embryos are a 20. We don’t give those out very often. I’d say we’re pretty mean about giving out 20’s”.

“At this point we like to see the embryos at the two or four cell stage. All of yours are there. We have graded them, and they all look good. You have one graded 18, seven graded 19, and two embryos we have graded a perfect 20.”

Michelle starts to tear up. I don’t know if you could call it parental pride yet, but that’s what if feels like, excitement, relief, and pride. Not many parents get to tell their kid they had cause to be proud of them when they were still a zygote.

The embryologist informs us that we will not be doing a day three transfer, but will wait until day five. The disadvantage of growing embryos to day five is that some of them won’t make it that far. The advantage is that the extra couple of days gives more time for the exceptional candidates to stand out, and the odds they will develop into a pregnancy are higher. The improved odds decrease the number of embryos that need to be transplanted back into Michelle, thus reducing the chance of twins.

Day 5 – Transfer Day

Four of our embryos are ready. A few others are developing more slowly, and may come along far enough to be frozen, but that is not today’s concern. We must decide how many embryos to transfer.

We must balance the desire to have at least one of the embryos take hold, with the risk that more than one might. We want to maximize the chances of getting Michelle pregnant, but we don’t want a multiple birth, which would increase the health risks for her and the babies.

The doctor tells us Michelle’s egg reserves are excellent for her age, she reacted well to the ovarian stimulation, produced more eggs than average, and our embryos are star performers. Michelle looks 30 on the outside, and the doctor says her insides look about the same. She has grown fond of saying that she has the reproductive system of a thirty year old. Well, I’ve cleaned that up a bit, she doesn’t actually say “reproductive system”, but you get the idea.

We try and factor in all of this unscientific conjecture into our decision. In a thirty year old only one embryo of this quality might be used, but the statistics take a drastic turn for the worse when you are in your forties, like Michelle. The doctor suggests we select either two or three. We decide on three and the doctor and his team leave the room, but a short time later he walks back in and says, “The number of embryos is a big deal guys. We all have to live with the consequences, so you need to be comfortable with the choice.” I suspect he may have the same hesitancy we do. We talk it over again, and bump the number down to two.

They show us the two embryos on a large monitor connected to the lab microscopes, and then they are transferred into Michelle. The doctor points out the white dot on the ultrasound caused by the tiny air bubble they use as a marker. It is crazy to have so much riding on what is taking place right now at that little bright spec on the screen.

Happy Sticky

We must wait twelve days for news. In twelve days a blood test will reveal the results of all that preceded it. In twelve days we will know if either of the embryos survived and stuck to Michelle’s uterus. There is nothing left for us to do but follow the instructions provided as we left the clinic, “Think happy sticky thoughts.”

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